Written by: VWoods
I am only intense in my expression of things I feel passionate about and at other times I can be viewed as an observer of life; a friend of mine went to the grocery store with me recently and from the car to the breakfast aisle, looked at me and said, “You are too wild, you need calmness in your life”. This is unusual especially seeing that I am pretty calm, precise and focused in what I do on any given day. In hindsight, that was very perceptive in picking up something of my character that I attempt to hide from the ordinary person and it all goes back to my relationship with God. What? Yes, my relationship with God.
My calling was unusual to say the least and after months, it most likely was longer than months, but in these months before submitting, the call was especially strong; however, I heard the call and took off running, I did not remember the scripture reading which went, “today if you will hear his voice, harden not your hearts, as in the provocation” (Hebrew 3:15). I literally moved from state to state to state trying to run from the voice of God calling me and he finally caught up with me on I95 on the outskirts of Laurel, Maryland on a Sunday afternoon when I was on my way to Florida. Traffic was heavy, rain was drizzling and all the lanes were occupied with back to back traffic except my lane, the fast lane of course. I realized that I was boxed in, only there was no cars close behind me; before I could be fully mindful of this, a car sped up behind me and hit me at a speed of close to 85 mph. It was a sports car and it hit my car like a shot of lightning and my car started dancing in the air like a football and landed facing the opposite direction in the ditch.
I was shocked and a little shaken because my car door landed on a dead deer lying in the ditch and as I tried to squeeze out of the car, I heard a voice saying “if you don’t give your life to me, you will end up dead just like this deer”. I wasn’t hysterical immediately the accident occurred, but after the voice spoke, I think that shook me up more than the accident. People in cars were stopping to find out if everyone involved in the accident was okay, and my thoughts were, I need to find a church and get baptized NOW.
I did not call the cops, but took out the phone and rang a close friend who was in the church; at this point I did not care if it was Catholic, Protestant, or Methodist etc. I just wanted to give my life to God as soon as possible; that day if possible. I know this was crazy, but it seems that the same speed I had been running from relationship with Jesus, it was the same speed I started running toward Him. Face to face encounter with death will do that to you. I call it “manhandle” how He got my attention, but I believe if left alone, I would not have paid any attention to this calling.
So what does this have to do with being wild? You see, something happened on that highway years ago; He spoke and I heard, and in hindsight I had an oversight of what happened to my car with me inside it (I won’t say vision, I just was aware of everything that had happened) and there is no way that no one died from that accident with the force of the collision. So I know about the power of God to create havoc, yet He orchestrates that power to get your attention. I am aware of things happening in the supernatural without you seeing the angels doing what needs to done yet we in the natural see chaos which ends with calmness.
I now had something that many people did not: I had experienced the fierce, yet controlled handling of God upon someone He loves. I am now aware of the mighty wind of God which sweeps in and disrupts your life in a second, yet it leaves you unharmed but aware of His will. I am now knowledgeable about how when He speaks softly and you ignore that gently voice, actions can follow which leave the people around you in shock, but you can smile because you know that heavenly instructions have intensified and must be obeyed. So that “wildness” my friend perceived, creeps up on me every now and again when I am unable to contain it, but it is a tangible expression of that which is within me.
It is a cry that remains silent for the most as I beseech Him that called me and I see churches worshiping God yet there is no manifestation of His glory; people praying day in and out yet they are still to tap into that force or His mighty rushing wind “And suddenly there came a sound from heaven as of a rushing mighty wind, and it filled all the house where they were sitting” (Acts 2.2 KJV). This “wildness” that was perceived is the fierce cry within me that cannot be expressed in polite congregations, else they will look at you strange and categorize you as “strange”. It is that overflowing power and might which takes you over and you cannot contain, but you dare not in the gathering where you fellowship let it out for the church is not in sync with the true understanding of “Quench not the Spirit” (1 Thessalonians 5:19 KJV).
It unnerves me to be in a church congregation and there is no move of God, but my soul is crying out for a pending move of the rushing wind which would not come because of disobedience, but of fulfillment of that which happened to the prophets of old, “So the spirit lifted me up, and took me away, and I went in bitterness, in the heat of my spirit; but the hand of the LORD was strong upon me” (Ezekiel 3:14 KJV). I crave the manifestation in the body of Christ; I long for different things to happen, for the wildness crying out within me to encounter that which will fill, complement and complete it. Am I the only one who has this desire? Am I the only one who ran from the pursuit of God and His angels? I don’t think so.